Survivor Bro Number Two here, and I specialize in all things tool.
Let us teach all our viewers how to survive an entire night in the great outdoors.
You will need the following:
One knife, not too sharp so there's no danger of cutting yourself.
One bag of red hot cheetos to supply crucial nutrients.
And that's it!
You will be able to live off of the fat of the land with our simple tips.
First, you will need to decide upon the design of shelter you prefer. How big and what style of architecture are key things to think about. I like to set up under a tree where there are plenty of spiders to keep all of the ants away. Catch additional spiders and bring them to your site or you will suffer from black ant bites, the worst!
Using your dulled knife blade, cut branches, always cutting towards your body and face so you get a close and accurate view of tour knife skills. Use these branches to form a shelter, as long as there is a roof overhead you will be safe and warm.
Speaking of staying warm, if you are surviving the outdoors for an extended time make sure to get plenty of sun exposure during the day to keep you warm through the night. You know you are getting the right amount of sun when you begin to feel some exhaustion and severe thirst.
So now you are thirsty. Simple! The ancient romans would practice the art of bloodletting; a drink of blood prevents you from getting parched. If you can find fresh running water then you are in luck. Follow any stream to its end where the water stagnates. If there are any dead animals in the water then you know the water must be good as the animal must have kept drinking the water because it was too delicious until it drank itself to death. Kind of like how my Great Uncle Emerson died LOL!
Never boil water; it will be too hot to drink and may scald your mouth or tongue.
The best way to catch a fish is by throwing large rocks into water where fish may be sleeping. Never cook fish you catch: the Japanese call raw fish "Sushi" and it is considered by many to be a delicacy.
If you find an already dead animal, do not eat it. Unless there are little bugs that you notice enjoying the meat in which case those bugs can't be all wrong so dig in.
When making a fire you must get an ample supply of fresh wet grass and limbs to burn. Wetter is better, an easy rhyme helps you remember. The only way to know if the fire has gotten hot enough is to touch it with your index finger. If you feel a burn then the fire is now hot. Never blow on a fire, that's how fires get blown out.
The brighter colored berries taste the best. Add some to boiled pee for a relaxing tea.
Make traps by digging a hole then putting your knife in it at such an angle it kills any beast that falls in. Also do not fall in .
Test your ability to remember where your campsite is by closing your eyes and wandering off as far as you feel like. Stars shining in the sky overhead will get you lost, ignore them.
Continued...
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